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American Idol – The Top 12?

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I am not the typical American Idol (AI) fan. To clarify, I just watch the show from time to time. In fact, I am the FAN of very few things. In some circles I wouldn’t want anyone to know that I watched AI at all. Still… I will watch almost anything that can hold my interest for at least 30 minutes. Alas, the truth comes out…I am a chronic channel flipper. Why? Because I prefer music or silence. TV is distracting and you can’t really watch it and do other things at once. I typically like to watch the American Idol auditions because I am also a fan of laughter. During these pre-idol games I find myself on the floor with uncontrollable convulsions, giving props (or cudos for those who couldn’t quite understand the lingo) to the producers and editors who knew just what clips would catch the attention of millions.

Not being the typical AI fan. I must also report I am also not an American Idol nay-sayer either. It does hold a certain level of repeat although little variety entertainment. I do however, feel a little bit sad for what AI represents. I feel like it is contrived and the whole premise undermines hard work and effort that many singers of the past and present have had to endure in order to reach stardom. Here come 3 people and the audience who help by-pass this seemingly flawless mechanism of “making it.” That being said, every now and again (usually towards the end) when there’s nothing else to contend…I will watch AI. So what did I think of last night’s Top 12???

Last night’s task was for AI contestants to do their own rendition of a song of the great Diana Diva Ross hersself.

Lakesha Jones:

She’s a lotta woman and a lot of voice. What can I say? She must have sang a lot of gospel as a kid. She comes across very professional and a lot older than the other contestants. I’m not sure of her actual age and I’m too lazy to look it up. But, I’m sure she’s one of the older ones. She has such a presence.

My advice: Get a trainer girl! Get somebody to help you stick to a healthy eating plan with Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers. Don’t get mad at me! I’m just Tellin’ it Like it T-I-Tiz! Unfortunately, we are in the society we’re in; you DO have to be pleasing to the eye in some way shape or form. Lakesha…Now would be the time to make some healthy choices and hit the gym!! It’s a lifestyle…did you see her mom and her aunt? Whew!!! Reminder: This is not a sensitive blog. ONLY the truth will be told here…I’m just Tellin’ it like it T-I-Tiz!!

Chris Sligh:

Wow!! I like him. He’s not much to look at. In fact, him and Lakesha can probably working on a healthy lifestyle together!!!

The curly hair is different. I’m going to say I like it. You can at least tell he’s trying. Please don’t say your hair is like Diana’s!! Do you know how long that woman has worked on perfecting her signature hair-do? Totally disrespectful. She’s not a pet.

My advice: Image consultant. No, in this case he needs some gay male friends. Take their advice to heed. They might even have some advice about the hair (although I kinda ‘ like it).

Sanjaya Malakar:

The Good: Cute

The Bad: The Hair

The Ugly: Drag queen meets boy meets wet cat.

Where was his PR person? Shoot his stylist!! The poor boy was sent out to the wolves with absolutely NO preparation. What is he 17? As cute as his smile was… his voice and hair wasn’t. Is this the best America has? It has to be something I’m missing. When your background singers can drown the soloist out…that’s not good…right?

Diana Ross’ comments were right on the money. He may have the winning ingredient…”but its not his hair!” The one thing I’ll agree with Sanjaya on…What was Simon talking about? (I’m not 17)

Brandon:

This young man just lost his black card. He had no rhythm. He was absolutely horrible. I don’t know how he made it this far. No more comments. I refuse to give him more time than he’s worth and dwell on the fact that there was someone more deserving that was overlooked.

Melinda Doolittle:

My advice: Image consultant or some gay male friends…quit wearing those unflattering outfits!!

What a cutie. Her perfume and make-up must be made by Humble Pie, Inc. It’s truly sickening. But when she sings, she transforms into a different creature altoghether. The deer in headlights is pretty sickening.

Haley who?

3 words: Project! Project! Project Outwardly! (oops, that’s 4)

At the end of the song…she projected well. I wasn’t sure why she held back for most of the song. She can…she just won’t. The unforgiveable thing is that she forgot the words to the song…I would’ve smacked her if I was Diana. She needed a smack. Here you have the chance of a lifetime and you forget the words to a 3 minute song of an icon you had the opportunity to meet? I felt bad for her. I felt even sicker with Simon’s incessant flirting. I will admit she is much cuter than his girlfriend. Are they still together?

All in all…NOT an idol!!!

Phil Stacey:

What a voice!! In stark contrast ot his jerky non-rhythmic movements.

My advice: Practice singing in a full-length mirror! Maybe, being aware of his limbs will give him a better stage presence. I would also advise that he doesn’t sing to just the front row. That’s not a way to make fans. Also…QUIT STARING AT THE AUDIENCE!! It’s creepy!

He had a great song. I didn’t believe him because I was distracted by whatever he was trying to do with his hands, arms, and legs. Especially his arms. I’m thinking the bald look is not the look for him either. It makes him look creepier. I would hate to be alone with him in the elevator and he was practicing singing to himself or something. That would be a scary ride.

Stephanie Edwards:

What a cute little girl. She had the opposite syndrome of Haley. She just had to belt the whole the song. The song required build-up. You can build up if you’re at 10 the whole time. She did however acquire the same disorder of forgetting the words!! How dare these lucky folks forget words? I would never go to another of their concerts if they had one. Another smack should be handed out by Diana. I don’t care how cute she is.

I’ll leave her with two C’s: Confidence and Control

Chris Richardson:

Don’t dance. Don’t dance…please. An alternative is to move around smoothly. Maybe the erratic movement was causing him to be OFF the entire song. Then you had to ask yourself if the band was suppose to drown him out? He did however, look very dapper. He has the Boy Band Look down to a science…with a cup of charisma to go along with that. That’s why Paula likes him. Have you noticed she has a thing for the cute or crooning guys? Paula…you’ve been hanging out with Demi Moore.

Agreeing with Simon: All the guys had problems up to this point!!!

Gina Glocksen:

Diana Ross gave some good advice in this case. Ishe didn’t listen.

I really like this girl’s energy! She brings something different to the competition. It’s not just stale Disney or flat songs. She typically is Rockin’ it! The last time I tuned in she was peppy she had a great song by the Eurythmics (one of my favorite 80’s bands) and now I’m not so sure. What happened? This song she seemed to have more than pitch problems and now that Ms. Ross pointed it out…e-nun-ci-a-tion problems as well. But, who cares right? If she becomes the next AI, she’ll be in the studio and no one will care because the CD will be a hit!!! Just don’t go to her live show.

Jordin Sparks:

Nexxxxxxt! Not impressed. Sleepy. Didn’t believe it.

Unless AI is looking for another Disney songstress, she is NOT the next AI. She is in no way on the level of the other women. According to my significant other, she would win any high school competition in the country. I’ll have to agree with his insight on that one.

I absolutely disagree with the judges…she is not a contender. Now she may win a popularity contest…a singing contest?…NO.

That’s my take on AI…Don’t get mad at me!! I’m just Tellin it Like it T-I-Tiz!!!

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About tiiz

Young forever at heart.

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